Sleep

Oh, sweet sleep. I forgot (ok, not really) how much sleep occupies your mind with a newborn. You obsess about how much sleep you are getting, how much sleep your newborn is getting, where she is sleeping, where you are sleeping, what habits you are creating and which ones you want to establish. It's exhausting-- both the sleep and thinking!

Joe and I have always agreed about one thing: we will not let our kids "cry it out."

Here is an article that summarizes some of the sleep and brain research:

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/uk_news/education/8636950.stm

When Kai was just a little guy (maybe 1-2 months), I randomly picked up a book about sleep and it happened to be filled with research from Europe all about a newborn's brain. It stressed that the higher level of the stress hormone, cortisol, occurs when a baby is left to cry it out and this affects the baby's brain in a negative way. The BBC article mentions the research says this happens when a baby cries for more than 30 minutes. We have read in other studies that it could be after 15 minutes.

But, really, for us, what seals the deal is a great piece of advice that Jen Costigan gave us-- she said, "Parent during the night like you parent during the day." This makes perfect sense to us.

So, do our kids cry? You bet. Do they do it sometimes alone? Oh yeah. But, I guess we have decided to not let them do it for a long time and to give them comfort when their little bodies are in need. Of course, this looks different for a 3 year old than it does for a 30 day old.

So far, Ruby has been a pretty decent sleeper. Although, recently she only wants to sleep in our bed or in our arms. Right now, she is in her grandmother's arms and has been for most of the day (Thank you Susie!)

I am, of course, a bit worried about this. Honestly, we hope she will be a better sleeper than her brother. Kai didn't sleep through the night until he was 2. God, that was tough! We have a plan on ways in which we hope she can sleep better. We hope we've learned a bit in the past 3 years. We are patient and know that the "experts" agree that at 3 months you really need to have a good plan in place. But, we are working on one now too.

But, so far, our plan doesn't include crying on her own and this works for us. I know it doesn't work for everyone. In fact, I have many, many friends who swear that "crying it out" saved their marriages, made their lives more manageable, and created way better sleep habits for their kids. This makes sense to me too. Just not for our kids so far.

Stay tuned.....maybe it will change. Maybe not.

Kai's School

Kai with his guide, Gina, and of course, his baby sister who he was so proud to have with him.




We recently went to "Wonderful Welcoming Wednesday" at Kai's school (Sunny Hollow Montessori). Kai was excited to show all of us (Joe, Ruby, Reba, and I) his classroom and all of the important and fun work he has been doing.

We were so excited to go since Kai was thrilled to have us and recently getting Kai to school in the morning has been a bit tricky. Once he is out the door, he is happy to be going and then when I pick him up, he is all smiles and stories about what a great day he had.

But, when he wakes up-- man, it's tough. We often have tears and last week he said, "I wish Sunny Hollow would die and go to heaven so I wouldn't have to go there anymore." On that particular day, when I picked him up, he said, "I had the best day ever at school today Mama." So, yes, you can imagine the delicacy of the situation.

Here are some photos from a perfectly wonderful visit (no talk about hating school or heaven). He loves the "practical life" activities the best and also working on maps and bird identification. His teachers are wonderful and comment on what a great sense of humor he has, how sensitive and kind he is, and also how social. I might have mentioned it before, but his teacher told us that he is the most extroverted child in the classroom!

Blast from the Past

I'm finally trying to get caught up with some photos.....Here is Ruby at 2 weeks old.





Here is Ruby at 3 weeks old.

Eloise

We were at Eloise's baptism this past weekend (Kt's daughter who is Ruby's best friend) and enjoyed the celebration!

Kai had the congregation laughing! At one point, the minister was praying and just when she paused for a moment of silence, Kai said (quite loudly), "Who is this Jesus guy?" Now, remember, Kai's grandfather is a minister! He has been to church quite a bit, but we've never heard this comment before.

Then, when the minister walked Eloise down the center aisle letting the congregation get a look at the cutie, Kai said, "Is that Eloise's fairy godmother?"

Hee Hee-- I just love that boy.

Pretty in Pink

Reba

We were so lucky to have Reba come and spend a whole week with us. Reba is 12 years old and the second oldest of Rosie's kids (Joe's twin sister). She was truly the greatest gift-- and the best mother's helper. I don't think there are many kids who are as fun, responsible, competent and energetic as Reba. Reba helped me tons with Ruby June (holding her, burping her, changing her diapers, rocking her etc.) and also with Kai (playing, playing, playing!!). Reba also made lunches, did the dishes, folded probably over 20 loads of washes, and swept the floor. I know-- seriously, how lucky are we???

We tried to make the week not all work and some play. Joe, Reba, and Kai made a couple of trips to get ice cream and explore some parks and waterfalls.

Reba and I also made a daring trip to the Mall of America (what 12 year old comes to Minneapolis and doesn't go to the MOA?) along with Ruby J. I can't say I was a good fashion consultant though to Reba-- at one point, I said, "You are asking me what is hip? Look at me!! " (Ok, picture me not showered, with a baby in a sling, breast milk and spit up all over my shirt, and pants that you could see the maternity band with my belly spilling over it) I just had to laugh!

First Smile

Week Three

Every night I think I will post more photos here on the blog and every night I am so exhausted that I collapse into bed (just to wake up a couple of hours later)...so, for now, I'll just quick give a little update.

Ruby turned three weeks today and she is simply the sweetest little baby. And, Kai is a great big brother, too. Tonight, Joe asked Kai to hold Ruby June while he went to the bathroom. I peeked in at Kai and Ruby to check on them and Kai was kissing Ruby so sweetly and saying how much he loved her and this was the best, he said: "Ruby, I will keep you safe."

Ahh.....it doesn't get much better than that!

Kai had Spring Break this past week and it was Joe's first week back to work, so it's been a long week, but thank God for family and friends! We made it through it just fine.

Ruby had her first visit to the ER though and she is continuing to have some problems. She isn't pooping which is a concern to the doctors, since she is still so little. She is going on Day 6 right now (after having gone 4 days before getting some help to poop in the ER), so it looks like we will need to get some tests done to see what is going on. We spent over 1 1/2 hours today at the Cranio-Sacral Therapist doing some bodywork with her to see if that helps out. It works like wonders for Kai for any health issue he is having, so we hope it will do the same now with Ruby.

Yes, it does feel like I am all about body functions and fluids lately-- breast milk, poop, pee, and spit up. I guess it's a sign of being a mom!